Lyrics

one A.M.

well you’re screaming at the top of your lungs
from the trailer park again
and it just so happens that i’m downwind
it’s hard to say when it started
and when it’ll end
but it’s getting closer and it’s coming in

and i know your pain is real
it’s one A.M. and i can hear you still

now i’m standing on the back of my porch
looking at your door
is your light still on
what are you looking for
well i stumble on back to bed and ask God instead
now i’m praying circles and i’m in my head

and i know your pain is real
it’s three A.M. and i can hear you still

in the morning all i see is reflection in the glass
of holy water and a crooked past
now i’m staring you face to face
i wanna run away
back to all my comfort in a simple day

and i know your pain is real
the sun is rising and i can hear you still
the sun is rising and i can hear you still

rosalie

doors open like they do everyday
a man walks in to take his place
good ‘ole rosalie was sitting in her seat
she said i’m not here to change the world
but I’m not going anywhere

martin’s preaching from the holy book
people listen congregating like they should
well a man who won’t die for something
is not fit to live until he will

i said it is what it is if you’re not doing anything
i said it is what it is if you’re not doing anything
from bombay to burminghan, london to lubumbashi
driver keep on driving i’m not going anywhere

mr johnson what you gonna do
not expecting things to go this far
a journey a thousand miles long
starts with just one step from someone

brothers fathers
sisters mothers
scared but brave
beautiful and afraid
great and common
peaceful purpose
ordinary
tired but not dismayed
tired but not dismayed

dark black heart

well i’ve tried all of my life
to escape this disease
and get rid of my strife
but the truth is it cuts like a knife

and i’ve run away from my friends
loved ones who know where i’ve been
who i’ve hurt
and despised in my sin

oh there it is my dark black heart
and my pride deep inside

i’ve been doing these things for so long
can’t tell my right from my wrong
there’s no help
in my prayer or my song

but last night i read from a book
about a father and son he forsook
and how much love
oh love that it took

oh there it is my dark black heart
and my pride deep inside

but oh it opened my soul
brought in the light and swallowed me whole
poured out the poison bled to the ground
as i made my way back to town
come see the only man who’s known
oh who’s known me

silicon valley romance

well i walked down the street today
and what i saw to say the least pushed me further and further away
i never thought i’d have to compete with you
to compete for you in such a trivial way

so don’t look for me sitting on the side, sitting on the side of life
don’t look for me until you decide to please stop taking up my time

plenty of times i have tried conversations
about the rain last night, my inspiration
silicon valley material possessions
well addition to fiction becomes obsession
i don’t give a damn about your instagram

don’t look for me sitting on the side, sitting on the side of life
don’t look for me until you decide to please stop taking up my time
oh life is passing you by, passing you by and by
your whole reality is nothing but a lie so please stop taking up my time

so put down your phone and let’s walk home
or am i walking home alone without you
put down your phone and let’s walk home
or am i moving on without you

don’t look for me sitting on the side, sitting on the side of life
don’t look for me until you decide to please stop taking up my time
oh life is passing you by, passing you by and by
your whole reality is nothing but a lie so please stop taking up my time

tuesday morning

it’s only tuesday morning and i’m tired of telling truth
seems i’d rather be living lies, living large and living loose
you say it doesn’t matter that we all just die the same
but there’s this burning coal inside of me saying i’m to blame

to align my heart and mind is no easy path to take
for what is grace if nothing more than means to my escape
my days on earth are numbered and i’m fickle in my youth
but it’s only tuesday morning and i’m tired of telling truth

four long days of silence or was it you just screaming mad
seven years of prozac how we cling to what we have
we say that this is living turning cheeks and changing proofs
but it’s only tuesday morning and i’m tired of telling truth

it’s only tuesday morning oh, it’s only tuesday morning
it’s only tuesday morning and i’m tired of telling truth

i see the end

brother don’t you know i see you from afar
with the men you’ve brought i know that you’re still scarred
now the time has come to pay for what i’ve done
and the lies that i have whispered in your ear
well i’m overcome and paralyzed with fear

i’ve seen the face of God, been wrestled to my knees
consumed with all the possibilities
i have all that i want but the great irony
is that all i have is now beneath your feet
you can toss me and throw me as you please

your men are getting closer now, i’m feeling like a coward
you’re bigger and you’re stronger now, your shoulders have filled out
my mind tells me to run, in my sin i’m stained and bound
in an instant i’ll be gone, i’ll be gone i’ll be gone
in an instant i’ll be gone, i’ll be gone i’ll be gone
in an instant i’ll be gone, i’ll be gone i’ll be gone
in an instant i’ll be gone, i’ll be gone i’ll be gone

but you ran to me and wept upon my neck
but you ran to me and wept upon my neck

none undone

well i’ve seen it coming
i’ve been spending my whole life
trying to color in this picture that i’ve drawn
trim up all the edges
hope to God i don’t leave none undone

well i’ve seen it coming
i’ve been practicing my charm
but it don’t take long for that to wear all off
darlin’ don’t you leave me
darlin’ please don’t leave me in the dust

so, why do i keep hiding away my face
afraid to lose the favor i’ve found in grace
everyday i’m learning to play the game

pops you know i love you
i hold on to everything
and i always put such weight behind your word
but i know i need to grow up
and find a different place to store my worth

in the midst of affirmation
oh i want to remain plain
let it be the inner man of the heart
that wins over affection
with a simple quiet spirit to impart

so, why do i keep hiding away my face
afraid to lose the favor i’ve found in grace
everyday i’m learning to play the game

complications of my heart’s wellbeing
always expose my heart’s need for pardon
and they erode this stubborn shell that i’m trapped in
always exposing my heart’s need for pardon

so, why do i keep hiding away my face
afraid to lose the favor i’ve found in grace
fearful that the love i’ve known will fade
teach me how to play a different game

blue eyes

blue eyes
i see you in your knew dress
i can’t complain, i know that in this context
my compliment’s platonic
cuz love grows in kinds of its own
i know this much and i’ve seen where it goes

it’s true now
that i’m working on my patience
i want to be content with where i am
instead of reaching for the future
or something that i should not have
oh life is so much more than that

the race

i spend my time these days
comparing all my righteous ways
run faster than my friends
sleep easy thinking that i’m safe
fearful comparison
it’s just a way to hide my face

caught between running and the race
i see the cloud and the weight
the rough black pavement
the choir’s anthem calls my name
Author of faith
despised and punished for my sake

all this running and i wonder if you’re there
seems my words can fall vacant in the air
with mud upon my eyes, help my soul to see
the substance that i seek is as real as i am free

i wanted you to know

i waited for the winter
oh i wanted you to know
some things you don’t get over
oh i wanted you to know
i still find myself here standing
out on the patio
waiting just to see your face
waiting just to see if you’ll come home

the last time that i saw you
oh how could i have known
such a picture of youth and strength and love
could vanish with the falling sun
and even in the quiet
i still can hear your voice
and i know how much she loved you
when you left the car and went running into the trees

tell me where’s the justice
in dying so damn young
these days it seems so distant
but i’m in the bathroom sobbing
and i’m losing sleep all over again
while you’re resting soft and peaceful
really i’ve got no conclusion
but that death finds us all living
maybe i’ll call her and tell her i love her again

my friend

it’s funny how i can see clearly
after the turning of time runs its course
and i knew that this wouldn’t be easy
when i realized what you were living for
old memories and fading times

i see the beauty of creation
and i long for purpose in life
but stretching beyond narrow reason
requires desire from the heart
oh desire from the heart

these days that you love will come to an end
time, it will catch you my friend
oh my friend, oh my friend

self serving soul domination
can disguise itself in many different forms
and i can’t keep my eyes off all the sacrifices that you make
to preserve what you love
and forsake all else

and really we’re not much different
i’ve kicked and i’ve screamed just to say
our actions will expose what our hearts hold dear
based upon these sacrifices made
oh on these sacrifices made

these days that you love will come to an end
time, it will catch you my friend
oh my friend, oh my friend

porcelain fine

thin crack in porcelain fine
still beautiful from the side
lord knows how many times
i’ve tried to define

something’s wasting, something’s wasting
something’s wasting, something’s wasting away

now my thoughts, they turn to
the first conversation we had
who knew such perfect times
would end so sublime

something’s wasting, something’s wasting
something’s wasting, something’s wasting away

restless days and dreaming nights
hold countless thoughts to occupy
perfect fit in my analytic mind but
what do i know, oh i can’t decide

something’s wasting, we’re just wasting
something’s wasting, we’re just wasting away

i never really thought you’d go but at least now i know
that i’m satisfied to see us with eyes wide open
your beauty is real, i’m humbled and hurting
the sorrow i feel is behind a contemplative curtain
it’s nothing that you ever did but this needs to be done
goodbye for now, it’s time to move on

declivity

here’s the thing about falling off
you don’t know where you are ’til you’re all crossed up
then you look around, see what you’ve got
and try to salvage all that you’ve forgot

and here’s the thing about falling off
you take advantage of what you used to call home
you play to my weakness and it gives me hope
before i realize that it’s all a show

___, ___, won’t you listen to me
as you’re building your philosophy
you’re not the girl that i thought you’d be
you’re not the girl that i hope to see

you’d never guess whats running through my head
staring at the ceiling laying in bed
thinking about what our Father would say
and if the both of us will be called by name

how many years will it be before
i say this to you in a different form
this song will be a distant memory
but these effects will be so haunting

___, ___, won’t you listen to me
as you’re building your philosophy
you’re not the girl that i thought you’d be
you’re not the girl that i hope to see